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[Jul. 8th, 2008|06:02 pm] |
I just started my summer class. Modern Philosophy. Probably the most boring and simplest epoch of Western philosophy that I can think of. I've read half of the crap that I am expected to read in this class and I feel like I am wasting 630$. Hell, I'm reading Hegel and actually understanding his texts, I don't want to putz around by reading high-school level philosophy like Descartes' and Leibniz. But it is a required class so I have to deal with it if I am to move on to my Ma program.
I had an interesting dream this morning. I dreamt that I was in something like an apartment-like structure (It was very abstract looking and it is hard to describe, let alone remember it accurately.) that lacked, in parts, a roof. I found in this enormous studio-like apartment many of my ex-girlfriends, including Jodi and Tawni. Hannah and Tina were in there somewhere, amongst others; I know this because I could feel them. I was asking them all to attend my birthday party. I cannot recall if they agreed to this, but I remember the experience of a good feeling being in their presence. I was particularly drawn to Tawni.
Aside from my dream, I began thinking of Hannah. Actually, I think of her a lot, and have for years since we had broken up. She is just about the only girlfriend who I really miss. I think from time to time how she is doing. I try to imagine what she looks like now. I have not seen her in over ten years, so she is in her mid thirties. She was 6' 2", red hair, an athlete, and an artist, and probably still looks the same as she did when I met her when she was 19. Her mothers side of the family has that youth-longevity thing going for them, like my mothers side of the family. Hannah was also weird and a little crazy. Still miss her. Knowing her dad, he probably forced her to marry a professional athlete or a self-made successful business man. Anything rich and powerful, and far away from the likes of an artist. Her dad hated the fact that his daughter had a relationship with me. |
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| OMG THE COAT BLOWING/THROWING!! |
[Jul. 8th, 2008|12:46 am] |
So since im new to this whole "husky owner" thing i did some reading up when i first found sabrina, it said they throw their coats 2 times a year, well sabrina has been getting rid of her winter coat to get her summer clothes on.
So for the past week i have been brushing her 2 or 3 times a day and also using one of those shedding tools, well, everytime im done its like i left a whole dog out on the deck, its ridiculous, i had heard the horror stories of them shedding but i didn't think it would be that bad....well, it is. I find it commical actually, and since i have been doing this her fur has gotten a lot lighter in color and a lot shorter, which is good for michigan summers. She looks like she has lost about 30 lbs since she isn't a big ball of poof anymore(all the poof is on the deck)
just another joy of this breed i suppose.
Am i using the right stuff with the saw blade looking shedder thing and a good wire brush? anything else you guys reccomend?
got any horror stories of your husky shedding? |
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[Jul. 7th, 2008|05:08 pm] |
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Reading C.G. Jung and listening to Skinny Puppy goes together well in a really fucked up way. |
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[Jul. 6th, 2008|09:43 pm] |
I recently moved to Alaska to be a dog handler for an Iditarod Musher. I'm currently caring for around 50 dogs, including six 9 week old puppies. I moved here from Tennessee with the intention of making the move permanent as I've wanted to live in AK for many years now. One of the conditions of taking the position I have is that my two siberian huskies be allowed to stay with me. Many kennels do not like their handlers to bring personal dogs.
My huskies are currently staying with my mom in TN, and the intention has been to bring them up here in the fall. I've been worried about a few things, however, and I want to do what is best for my dogs. First, I am worried about shipping them by air. I've read the horror stories, but I also know that many animals are shipped successfully. It's certainly not a short flight! Second, once here, my dogs would at least live some of the time tied out like sled dogs. While they have both lived some time outside, I consider them both inside dogs. My sleeping arrangements here would not allow that beyond possibly sleeping with them in my room at night. During the day they would be tied out when not with me walking, skijoring, or what not.
My only other option is to rehome them. Even if I move back to TN, I currently have nowhere to move to that I can keep them. My mom will soon be moving into an apartment where she will no longer be able to keep them for me. I don't want to rehome my dogs, and I don't believe in "moving" as an excuse to do so. I don't want them to suffer, either. Is bringing my dogs to Alaska by air and possibly having them live on a chain at least a good part of the day worse than being rehomed? Would finding them a more stable environment be better in the long run? I understand that dogs can be rather adaptable and would rather be with their owners, but I don't want to be selfish either. I guess I'm not quite sure where the line is here.
x-posted |
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| I did a bad thing today |
[Jul. 7th, 2008|12:10 am] |
I let sabrina off her lead.
Let me explain these actions a bit further before you kill me.
I was out at my families property, its 10 acres of woods and fields on a private lake, we were down by the lake and the dogs were playing, i had beaney on a big ole long rope, i finally got tired of her getting all tangled so i let her off the lead.
and guess what happened when i let her off the lead?
she took the hell off!
shocker right?
so jack and i sat by the lake and i smoked and enjoyed the sun, and i called sabrina a few times, nothing happened, after about 10 minutes i saw the tall grass start to move in the distance, and then i heard the jingle of her collar and then out popped sabrina happy as hell.
she came and stood by me for a minute and then took the frak off again.
i called her................nothin...............
so i packed up my gear and hiked over to the woods hoping she would find us, i was walkin along the trail whistling perodically and i got nothing, then boom out pops sabrina.
she was very tired, and from that point on she stayed by my side, we had a fire in the clearing in the woods and she just laid down by me with jack.
i was not surprised by her lack of listening to me.
i was pleasantly surprised by her willingness to return to me when she was done doing what she was doing.
It made me come to these conclusions.
I cannot trust her off a lead cos she just doesn't listen,...which is typical
and she loves me and the pack and will return as long as she doesn't get lost or hurt.
and i cant risk either of those.
it was tense and im lucky it turned out as well as it did |
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| jack gets owned by sabrina |
[Jul. 6th, 2008|01:20 pm] |
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| cos i like to show of my babies |
[Jul. 5th, 2008|11:21 pm] |
Here is a picture of sabrina looking asian,
and jack and her hanging out by the door
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[Jul. 4th, 2008|10:53 pm] |
I managed to avert a lot depression today by spending some time with Odessa. We went out, chatted some, and saw a movie. Wall-e is REALLY good. It transmitted a very effective message without being pretentious, preachy, or explicit.
Yesterday I also averted a lot of depression by hanging out with Shanti and did our ritual of going to a bar and chatting. I went out to the club after but it was not my place that night. It hasn't been for a few months now.
Earlier I spent most of the day with Lilly. She is a lot of dumb fun. Not as in stupidity, but in that my experiences with her are simple, she loud, laughs a lot, laughs at my jokes or hits me and then laughs about it later, and so on. She has demonstrated to a lot of my friends how annoying she can b; she can be that way with me too. It just helped me a lot to hang out with someone like her and become temporarily disconnected from intellectual pursuits, heavy feelings, head-ful issues, and so on. She threw up twice while we were driving around. She even pukes loud.
But again, I am not looking forwards to my weekend, but I only have to be worried about being depressed tomorrow.
I am a little worried about money. I usually pull out of it OK, but I am looking at next summer and I see myself spending a lot of money by living in Europe for 18 days. The practical side of me keeps telling me what an unwise idea that is, but it will not long before my Puer sensibility conquers it. It usually does. When I come back from Europe next summer, I'll be broke until loans come in the next semester.
I will be turning 38 next Thursday. A lot of other things worry me more than turning older. Frankly, I have a long way to go. I have been adopting Rae's quasi delusional theory of living for ever. I do not believe this for myself, but I have been finding that I tell others that I will probably live to 120 years old and have a body relative to a normal persons physical progression. By the time I hit 50, I'll look like I am somewhere in my mid to late 30's at this rate. Sometimes I feel like I am a shark, in that I would suffocate and die if I slowed down. |
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| Stardust |
[Jul. 3rd, 2008|10:39 am] |
We just got back from the vet, and she got her final shots and her rabies. Today is her 4 month birthday, and she already weighs 27 pounds. She is gonna be a big girl. Here's a picture of her, too. She is a healthy little girl. And right now she is a tired little girl.
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[Jul. 1st, 2008|11:59 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  worried | ] |
So I have a question about your relationships with your huskies.
What are some good ways to get gain a closer bond with your dog?
Because my boy Vader seems to as of late take more of a liking to my roommates.
I think this is mostly due to the fact that they are home 90% of the time because they don't work very often, where I am almost out 70% of the time, working constantly.
And I know he knows I'm his owner because when I come home he barks a lot and runs around and acts really crazy and excited and he doesn't do that for anyone else.
I've been taking him on walks around the neighborhood every night which seems to be helping.
I'm just wondering what are some games or whatever that I could play with him to give him the attention he might want or need?
Sometimes I get worried that I might overwhelming with attention to him. |
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| New pictures of Kadan + health question |
[Jun. 30th, 2008|02:28 pm] |
Kadan will be 6 months old on July 7th. He's about 47lbs now, and I'd say about 20" or so at the withers. He's so big and long! They never stay puppy-sized long enough, do they? :P
Anywho, I come bearing a couple of pictures I took this afternoon. He's long overdue to have some handsome mugshots posted here. The white on his coat is pretty dirty here (my front yard is entirely dirt/sand) but he doesn't look too terribly bad. I got a furminator a week ago after he was shedding really bad, and now there's rarely a speck of hair to be found of him on the carpet anymore. There were big ol' blobs of hair littering his crate overnight that I'd have to scoop up, but no more. I'm thoroughly impressed with that thing.
I just recently had to buy him a new collar, too because he outgrew his 14" nylon one. I wanted to get a rolled leather collar, but couldn't find any reasonably priced ones in his size (Petco wanted $19.99!!!) So I opted for another nylon one for now. I don't like the line it's putting around his neck in his coat, but it'll do for now.
Now for my question..
Look carefully at his right eye. Do you see it? He looks slightly off to the right in that eye! I haven't talked to his vet about it yet because I haven't really paid much attention to it until recently. Do you think it's something to be worried about, or maybe something he'll grow out of? My cat Tidus (now 6 years old) had an eye like that when he was a kitten, but it eventually corrected itself on it's own. I'm hoping this is the same case with Kadan. It's not a huge difference. It's just slightly off...but still. Now that I've taken notice, I look at it all the time.
Aside from that though, he's happy, energetic, and super smart. I find myself laughing at the "huskies are difficult to train" line that so many people threw at me before I brought him home, and what some people still tell me when I take him out places. He was fully potty trained at 3 months old, has never chewed up or destroyed anything in the house (excluding his chew toys), and he has excellent table and house manners. He will also "sit", "shake", "speak", "touch (my hand)", "lie down", and "roll over" now. I've never had any trouble with him misbehaving at all.
Clearly my Husky must be defective, right? :P |
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[Jun. 30th, 2008|05:16 pm] |
Sometimes I feel like I am like a balloon, rising into the air with little control, and I am reaching and scrambling for the earth. I have been feeling slightly desperate for grounding myself, to keep myself in a safe and stable place in my heart and mind. But I am not doing this for my body or material advantages. I just want something of my being to be grounded. I cannot get of my head the idea of Matter and that I can only find safety and security in that. It's like being scared and hungry. This is very contrary to how I have been thinking for the better half of the last decade. I feel like I am becoming desperate to grip the grass with my toes as the rest of me reaches up into the sky.
I have been depressed for the past two weekends. More so the last. Presently I feel meaningful to other people within margin, but I do not feel like I feel profoundly meaningful. It's loneliness, I guess. I recall hanging with Aaron at our place last Tuesday night at about 3:00 am, both of us admitting that life might be happier and easier if we were stupid and simple. The end of the party was meloncholy.
Last night, I was talking to Odessa. She just got back from Colerado. Which is very nice for me, because I was really Jonesing for some people company. And so we chatting for two hours. This was a welcome experience.
I'd like to cure depression and lonliness forever. Even if the cure arrives as a distraction that lasts forever, that might be fine. On top of this, I am currently beginning to struggle with being rooted in the ground and being in the lofty sky, at the same time. The part that hurts the most is doing all of this by myself.
The thing that cheers me up now is knowing that the weekend is over, and the week is here. This means Tuesday and Thursday nights, and Kung-Fu. Mandy also told me that she was putting money away for a European travel next summer. I'm going to have a travel partner! This makes me very happy. We spent a part of the morning talking about budgeting, destinations by train, and so on. That made me feel better. About 11 months from now, I'll probably be in Berlin. After five days, I'll take a train perhaps to Paris and stay there for five days, and then another train to Amsterdam for my final five. AT the moment I am liking this as a prospect to look forwards to. |
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| new husky mommy! |
[Jun. 29th, 2008|11:29 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  tired | ] |
My new child: Sinatra.
I am now the proud parent of a 13-week old white Siberian Husky puppy. He is so so so sweet and loves to lick and kiss and nibble. My boyfriend bought him for me as an [early] birthday present. We drove 3 hours to the Oregon Coast to get this little bundle of cuteness on Friday. We absolutely adore him.
We are both first-time Siberian Husky owners and are really enjoying the whole experience of owning this beautiful, smart dog. We've both had other dogs in the past. Growing up, I had a Golden Retriever [sweet & loving], German Shepherd [intelligent & bright], and a Beagle [fat & silly] and my boyfriend has had all Labs.
I must say I'm absolutely in love with this puppy and I can't wait to watch him grow into a beautiful big Husky.
As a first-time Husky owner, I do have some questions for some of you more experienced parents. I was told that they can never be off a leash because it is in their nature to just run and run and run. How true is that? We are leash training Sinatra because we live in an apartment complex and the dogs are supposed to be on leashes [I've seen a few big dogs off their leashes early in the morning], but once he gets older, we may want to take him to the park and let me run loose. I'm also an active person and enjoy jogging around our area when it's not too hot outside and I think he'd make a great companion once he's properly leash trained.
We're potty training Sinatra as well and he's only had a few accidents. He's a quiet boy so he doesn't whine to let us know when he wants to go out, so we're constantly watching him to make sure he isn't sniffing around a spot to pee on [we've laid large pieces of cardboard down in the hall and living room to keep him from peeing on the carpet]. However, he doesn't seem to poop as often as I would assume a puppy would. Last night I fed him 1/2 cup of food around 6:45, but he would not poop last night before bed. Then I fed him breakfast [another 1/2 cup] at 7am this morning and he didn't have to poop until around 10:30 this morning. Is that normal for a puppy not to have to poop frequently? We feed him Nature's Choice Puppy formula Chicken, Rice, and Oatmeal food [that's what his previous owner was feeding him]. We're giving him 1/2 cup in the morning, 1/2 cup in the afternoon, 1/2 cup at night.
Anyway, we absolutely love him and we take him with us everywhere to get used to the car rides and people and everyone always compliments us on him. Makes me a proud mum!
( more pictures of lil' blue eyes ) |
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[Jun. 27th, 2008|04:20 pm] |
I want to complain.
I was just whistled at from a moving car and called "Fabio" by the gender that I do not want. I am bothered by not getting that kind of attention from some one who I desire. I'm pretty tired of this. |
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| Happy 10th Kia!! |
[Jun. 27th, 2008|04:52 pm] |
My oh my where does the time go!!
Little Miss Spooky Eyes will be 10 years old this Sunday. Andy and I will be out of town so she'll get to spend it with grandma and grandpa. :D I'm sure they'll spoil her even more rotten. LOL!
I can't believe it's been 7 years since I first went into the Humane Society and spotted her out of the crowd of dogs. She made herself known by saying nothing at all. She's my first dog, my heart and soul. :)
( Kia in pictures ) |
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[Jun. 27th, 2008|02:44 pm] |
Having some drinks with Murph and Shanti was pretty hilarious last night, but it didn't last. I went to KGB and bumped into Amanda, whom I thought had moved on to another part of the country. She came back for a visit with Albuquerque, and there she was. She smiled and chit-chatted and we danced some, etc. (she is still the greatest dance partner that I've ever had. Moving with her just really clicks with me.) but when the club ended, I started getting that stupid "game" intuition, that if I asked her to come home, she would have. Only I refrained from it. And she just later went off with some one else.
Drove Aaron back to our place, and he went off a little on how much of a "cunt" she is. I am not sure what experiences he's had with her to warrant that opinion, but I know that I eventually had not the best of emotional throws with her the last she and I met. I really am best staying clear from sexually polymerous personalities when it comes to girls/women. I just get disappointed and sometimes hurt.
And then I recall how Mandy considers Nick. "The only one that matters." Wow! That is such a statement. That is the kind of honor that I feel I ought to have from someone who I really want.
It was hard getting to sleep that night. I was depressed. I woke depressed. I am looking forwards to Tuesday night, but this time for the distraction. It would be best if I refrained from drinking. I hope that I do not become depressed all of this weekend like I had last Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. |
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| new puppy |
[Jun. 25th, 2008|10:36 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  happy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | VH1 on tv | ] |
Well, my mom made me look for another husky puppy. We got one. She was born March 3, 2008. She was returned to the breeder where I got Starlight 3 years ago. They said that they would see him leave for 2 days at a time, leaving her stuck outside and alone the whole time. So, he brought her back to them. I emailed them, saying that my mom was wanting a new puppy. They said that we were lucky because they had a guy return a girl puppy.
We picked her up today, and she only cost us 150 bucks. We named her Sunlight. She is so cute, and full of energy. I let her outside with the big girls, and she ran and ran and ran.
Sunlight jumping up at the camera.
( more puppy Sunlight )
She's huge. She's already 20 pounds, and as tall as Starlight. She's got big feet, too. She is gonna be a lot bigger than Starlight. |
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[Jun. 25th, 2008|07:19 pm] |
Yesterday night was a lot like the Tuesday before, Maybe between 10-20 people depending on what time it was, a lot of art making, Aaron making music, and singing. Alcohol. I did some serious substance abuse myself. Shanti gave me the "Holy Shit" when I showed him how much I was doing. Sometimes I felt like my brain was melting. But believe it or not, it was a crazy and wonderful experience. I actually did some drawings that I liked. Shanti came on over and did some good drawings. He seemed to have a good time, and it was good to have him over. He cracked my up a strange comment that I do not want to mention. My neighbor came on over all dolled up. She was a knock out. And as I came on to her, she just walked all over me, and I just let her. One of these days I would like to meet with her while I am sober. Had good conversation with Sarah and Seth. Especially Seth. He was great to talk to. He has his MA in History and all he seems to want are answers. Rachel asked me to put my hand on her leg to show off an amazing piece of calcification on her shin. She took a lot of Ballet at one point and tore up her shin. Lilly's poor sap of a quasi boyfriend came over, clearly upset with her behaviors. I actually thought that was kind of funny, even though I felt a little bad for him. Aaron finally began to wrap things up with an exquisite corpse which was hilarious; Sarah made an incredible contribution to the writing and Aaron read it so well. Amanda, my neighbor, burned me up a little. She just sent off a shit load of receptive signals and I just ate it up. She also nearly drowned the plant on our alter with dirty water from the smoothie pitcher. That bothered me. Maybe she'll come on over again next week.
But right now I feel drained and powerless. My motivation is shot and have little energy. I woke up at 5:30 p.m. and wrote off the entire day. Drugs are bad. But they are also fucking great! |
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